You gotta be kidding me . . .

Normally, I don't rant and ramble about much . . . pretty laid back person I am by nature. Gotta tell you, it takes an aweful lot to rattle my patience. But, when it comes to utility companies and automated customer service answering systems, my last nerves can be plucked raw!

So it is with my phone company! Verizon . . . "the network people" you see on TV all the time. My issue was simple. I needed an explanation of an email I received from them - in which they announced the completion of a work order request that would result in an increase to my monthly bill. I had not made a request to change any part of my service bundle (internet, phone, or Direct TV) and thought it appropriate to make an inquiry about the email.

It seems that all Verizon's employees are too busy making television commercials than to man the customer service phone lines. This I learned by trial and error as I attempted to navigate their automated call screening system. It seems to me that a fellow should be able, within a minute to 2, to establish contact with a "real person" in customer service! Not an endless chain of voice prompts, not a series of dead end electronic loops, and the thing that is most ignorant of all - the hideous wait time - while the listener is subjected to static-infested music that cuts in and out, leaving you to wonder if your call is somehow lost . . . knowing all the bullshit you need to go through to get to this point again, should you choose to hang up and start over.

The quest for an answer is now 3 days old . . .

Yesterday, I managed to speak with 2 "real people". Neither one of them spoke understandable English . . . which to me, is absolutely unacceptable! Despite my efforts to communicate with them, it was impossible to get an answer . . . and, ironically, when I pressed the first individual for a "direct contact number" - after dialing it, I got another individual who was less fluent in english than the first one!

So . . . I tried their website . . . I had to reestablish a profile, validate who I was, offer my Mother's maiden name as a security question, go through email verification, and then explore account and services menus in an effort to track any recent changes to my account. Unfucking real! The only solice I can take is that the site is written in English! The absolute kick in the balls occured when I attempted to modify my service (downgrade unlimited calling and log distance to basic serice for a hard wired phone) - walking through an endless stream of screens, only to be given this message on the "submit screen" - "You must speak with one of our customer service representatives to make a service change" - Unfucking real . . . they send you back to electronic call screen hell . . .

Verizon needs to focus on 2 things - customer service and customer service! Right now, this utility sucks!