Kids . . .

A firefighter is working on the engine outside the station when he notices a little girl next door in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.

The girl is wearing a firefighter's helmet. The wagon is being pulled by her dog and her cat.

The firefighter walks over to take a closer look. "That sure is a nice fire truck", the firefighter says with admiration.

"Thanks", the girl says. The firefighter takes a closer look and notices the girl has tied her wagon to the dog's collar and the cat's testicles."Little Lady", the firefighter says, "I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that ropearound the cat's collar, I think you could go faster.

"The little girl replies thoughtfully, "You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren."

One thing is for sure . . .

when you're middle aged, you know you'll be growing out of it soon . . . there is life after 50!

It takes a little "courage" to get through Winter

99 Bottles or Beer . . . this is #22, John Courage Amber . . . a superb Scottish brew and one of my all time favorites. I had Courage for the first time while on a tour of duty in the UK a while back . . . the "local version" is a bit more full bodied, both the imported bottled stuff has much the same character and taste. No doubt . . . rating: 5

Signs of Spring!!!

It can be Spring soon, thank you very much . . .

I don't know about anybody else, but this winter weather has overstayed its welcome. I was out in the shed the other night and I swear my John Deere garden tractor blinked its headlight as if to be flirting with me! It's time to mow some grass, plant some flowers, drink some Coronas, and enjoy warm temperatures again.

Tomorrow I travel north to Narazeth, PA on business. Last year I brought back a whole truck load of firewood from that location . . . can camping trips in the ole motor home be too far off now? It's time for BBQ and campfires. Gawd, I miss all that stuff.

The ChemLawn people put down an application of something on my yard yesterday . . . duh . . . it snowed last night . . . it's time for these jokers to go! Guess they figure they can sneak up on a contract renewal by showing up mid-winter to perform an unsolicited service.

The Poodles need to go outside to run, frolic, and terrorize the Spring bunny population. I'm looking forward to seeing Abbey sprint across the yards again . . . Maddy will try to keep up . . . and Miss Olivia just wants to sniff everywhere, in no particular hurry, just sniff . . . the dogs have cabin fever almost as bad as me.

Can anyone think of one redeeming characteristic of snow? I can't. It can be Spring tomorrow, thank you very much!

Saw this on another blog . . .

I'm a sucker for a diorama of any genre

I build military-themed dioramas. You might say it's a passion of mine. When I see Department 56 or other Christmas-themed dioramas, I stop to appreciate not only the time it took for someone to "compose" their display, but I also admire how the vendors of these products provide all the necessary elements to create enchanting scenes such as these.

Note to self . . .

Some days are better than others . . . the last few have been a delight.

Solving a Blog Publishing Riddle

Yikes . . . I post nearly a month's worth of stuff only to discover it went missing . . . . uurrggh!!!

I was on it the minute I discovered the problem . . . asked the blog help desk for guidance and although I received back a boiler plate reply . . . it did set me on the right right diagnostic path to "figger it out". Seems I changed a setting without knowing the impact the new tweak would have on the orbit of my little blog planet . . . oops! Well . . . we're back and running!!!

New Flippin' Dell is Awesome!

If speed and enhanced features trip your trigger, the Dell E510, fully loaded, is the way to go! I'm impressed with this machine. It took about 35 minutes to set up and I must admit going into a state of shock dealing with all the cables and cords (laptops will spoil you). My only criticisms so far are these: a) set up instructions assume you have a technician's background, b) while most everything is pre-loaded, it takes over 2 hours to personalize the set up and download all the software updates (like they couldn't do that on the assembly bench), and c) aside from a few "quick set up cards", there are no manuals to explain anything (some of us crave data - data - data).

I am impressed with the speed of this unit . . . something I was unaccustomed to with the old Inspirson laptop . . . near-instant gratification with screen image changes and a super-fast boot to all programs . . . that's "tits" like they say around here! I'm not used to a digital input monitor and that's the first real magnificent difference to experience. The enhanced sound card, video card, and TV tuner make up the "media center" which makes the whole unit a "kicker". It'll be a few days more until I figure all that stuff out, but the thought of being able to watch or record my favorite TV programs when our widescreen HD TV is otherwise tuned in to Lifetime For Women is yet another pleasure yet to be enjoyed!

This baby can do it all . . . it'll be fun figuring out how it all works!

Another animated gif . . .

Our Grandson

Alijah Emory Morris

Dude . . . you're gettin a new Dell

Tomorrow the new Dell should be set up and running! I think this new unit is an improvement over our Inspiron laptop that recently bit the dust. Admitedly, I'm excited at the prospect of bringing the new unit on line . . . 3 gigs of RAM alone makes me dizzy thinking about the performance the unit is expected to deliver. Albiet a desktop model, the anticipated performance upgrade should be an awesome change of pace compared to the old unit.

99 Bottles of Beer #20 and #21

Heineken . . . I was disappointed with the taste of this stuff back in the 1970's and have suffered through the occassional bottle of this stuff along the way since then . . . nothing has changed. It's suppose to be a premium beer but IMHO, it falls way short. The dark version is a bit better and I've purchased a case or 2 of dark Heine in recent decades. The blonde version rates a "weak 3" and the dark rates a "3"

Guiness Stoudt . . . the perfect mate for Bass Ale when making a "black and tan" earns a stand alone rating of "4" and a marriage partnership w/ Bass it rates a "5".

Attempt to embed a video

Garfield gif . . .

99 Bottles of Beer #19

Sorry no photo . . . Blue Moon Belgian Wheat Style Ale, brewed by the Blue Moon Co (division of Coors Brewing) . . . where do we start? I bought a case of this stuff based on the recommendation of a beer distributor owner who has steered me right on several prior ocassions when I was trying to decide what new brew to try.

BMBWA starts out tasting pretty good. I skipped the recommendation to serve it with a slice of orange (maybe I should have listened). Bottles one and two reminded me of a fairly good microbrew. This is definately not a beer that will hang with you and not loose its flavor after 3 or 4 . . . by beer # 4, it tastes pretty much like Keystone Light and that's a huge shame! I seriously doubt if the addition of orange slices would save this one . . . any beer that needs fruit slice embellishment probably isn't worth buying again. Rating: very weak 3 (I won't buy it again, but will enjoy the rest of the case as a "one with dinner beer")

Adorable Pet Photos

99 Bottle of Beer (addendum)

Lowenbrau - "the lion's brew" has undergone an interesting cycle in the USA. Originally, it was a German import whose popularity peeked in the 1970's. It was considered a premium beer and commanded premium/import beer prices. The blonde version was good but its dark version was superb in texture and taste. It was "my beer" for over 2 decades until brewing rights were sold to Miller and they began brewing it domestically. It lost the unique Lowenbrau character and eventually most of its loyal fan base stopped buying it.

I was delighted in 2004 to see it is once again being imported from Germany and was surprized to find the price of a case was way-below other imports. The only downside to the equation is the fact that Lowenbrau Dark is not currently imported . . . needless to say, this brew has a rating of: 5

Lowenbrau Dark and Andecker (Pabst's premium) beers are currently OOP (out of production) and hence are not included in my "99 BoBs" - but both are perfect "5 Star Brews".

Some days seem like an uphill battle . . .

I have days like this too . . .

So, how bad is really bad beer?

Someone had to eventually send me an email and ask . . . so here's the criteria. In my beer rating system, 5 - 4 - 3 are all "good scores". To earn a 2 or less, the beer has got to taste so bad that even if it's being poured for me by Mandy Moore (pictured above, and yes I think she is a hottie), I could not bring myself to drink it, even at the risk of insulting Miss Mandy's hospitality! It's a guy thing . . . those who agree with me will surely know exactly what I mean when I refer to really bad beer. Shame on all of you who would lower your standards of excellence for the sake of a hottie!!! Shame, shame, shame!!!

OK . . . I've been holding off on this series of posts long enough! I've tried 'em and either like them or not. I only drink bottled beer (on tap too of course, but I don't do bars much). Those who know me also know that if a beer doesn't come in a bottle that requires an opener, I probably won't finish drinking it . . . that's just the way it is most of the time. Rating system, yep I have one.

Pretty simple:

5 Superb, would buy it again and share it only with my best friends and family.

4 Good, would buy it again, share it with anyone and not be ashamed.

3 OK, you buy it, I'll finish it if it's in a bottle.

2 Yuck, why did you buy this shit, wouldn't drink it even if it were personally poured from a bottle for me by Mandy Moore wearing just her underwear.

1 Weasel piss, maggot goo, rat snot, you get the idea.

So . . . here we go, the beers presented are in no particular order . . . but if it's a personal favorite, I'll let you know!

99 Bottles of Beer 16 through 18

Toohey's Old . . . a full bodied Aussie brown ale . . . rating: 5

Sam Adam's Cherry Wheat . . . I've never had a bad Sam Adam's brew . . . ever . . . this one came close to being a dissapointment but earns a solid rating: 4

Red Stripe lager . . . "hey maan" . . . this is excellent lager. rating: 5

I really did wave . . .

99 Bottle of Beer 13 through 15

J W Dundee Honey Brown . . . what can I say, for some reason I end up buying a case of this stuff every year and don't for the life of me know why. It's a pleasant beer to drink in the summer - I call it "lawn mowing beer" . . . definately drink it as cold as you can make it because there's much taste to it otherwise. Rating: weak 3

Michelob . . . "Bud's Best" or premium beer from our nation's largest brewery. Again, this is a lawn mowing beer . . . pleasant, best when iced down, and probably (for sentimental reasons) only one of 3 US brewed "traditional beers" I'd ever buy by the case. Rating: 3

Busch Lite . . . in 2 words, weasel piss! Rating: 1 (in cans, make that weasel piss to the third power).

99 Bottles of Beer 10 through 12

Negro Modelo - Easily the best tasting Mexican beer brewed! I really like this dark beer! While not readily available in small town beer outlets, its popularity is growing. I was first introduced to NM a few years ago at a Don Pablo's Mexincan food joint in Virginia . . . fell in love with this brew instantly! A personal favorite. Rating: 5

The moose is loose . . . Canadian import, Moosehead, has been around for a long time. It's one of those, if it's offered I drink it, but would never buy a case of it kind of beers. Not bad, but certainly not one that I prefer. Rating: 3

Quilmes of Argentine origin . . . kind of like drinking Corona without a lime . . . a light beer, with very little taste . . . I've had 2 bottles in my life time and consider that to have satisfied my quota. Rating: 2

99 Bottles of Beer - #7 through #9

Foster Lager . . . hummm, I drank this stuff out of the "oil cans" that were popular in the 1960's. Like Budweiser, Foster has great commericals but the beer isn't representative of a good Aussie beer. It was a "novelty beer" back then - that didn't taste all that good as I seem to recall (after 3 oil cans, judgement can be clouded) . . . from the bottle, today, well . . . not bad, I occasionally buy a case of it . . . rating: 3

Killian's Red . . . Irish "imitation" that falls way short in taste but folks buy it . . . rating: 2.

Labatt's Blue . . . Canadian import, I drink it if offered by a host, not a bad beer but I wouldn't buy it by the case . . . rating: strong 3.

Couldn't resist . . .

A look back . . .

Meritorious Service Medal

OK . . . I like sunsets

Funny . . .

OMG . . I know these people!

But not today . . .

99 Bottles of Beer 4 through 6

#4 Corona Extra . . . OK, I like the "party image of this beer" and I buy it. It's a "3"
#5 Dos Equis . . . much better tasting than Corona . . . "4"
#6 Edelweiss Weissbier Kristallklar . . . definately a "5" but hard to find where I live

99 Bottles of Beer 1 thru 3

Anchor Steam . . . 2

Bass Ale . . . 5 (personal favorite)

Carling Black Label (Canada) . . . 3